Demon Slayer Seeks Sidekick: Day Three

girl on bed with tattoosDemon Slayer Seeks Sidekick: The Follies of a Former Mental Patient Seeking a Friend to the End

(Read Day Two)

Day Three Friday May 6th

I reluctantly look at my emails to see it full of messages from this dating site. I roll my eyes. Is this really what is necessary for me to enter back into the dating world? I sigh with resignation. I log on and start replying, although I avoid the ones with the following horrific question:.

“What r u looking 4”

I wish I knew, dudes. I wish I knew.

I get to meet even more freaks online than I do on a regular basis. Yaaay.

The following conversation starts out okay, a little desperate and needy but hey, I guess me being on this site is desperate and needy so who am I to judge. Then it abruptly turns… I read this at a family dinner because we cool like that.

May 6th: sd16sd1: I can’t put into words how bad I want you to reply, you are amazingly beautiful!  please god let her reply to me!

T: Hi there. You are kind. What was your high and low point of the day?

sd16sd1: You just made my high point to my day that is 100% for sure, my low point of my day was hmm having to go back to work after lunch on a nice day lol, what was yours?  I work for the state of illinois department of health in the division that licenses hospitals, I get the fun job of handling all of the licensing fees paid to the division lol, how many dogs do you have? I love dogs 🙂

T: I have 2 dogs. I didn’t get your name.

sd16sd1: It’s Sam :),  I don’t think I got your name either

sd16sd1 :5/6/2016 10:44:47 PM
are you not into me?

sd16sd1: 5/7/2016 12:08:48 AM youre an ass old lady

sd16sd1 5/7/2016 9:20:48 AM this is why i am 33 years old and single, it’s women like you, you don’t want to settle, you don’t want a normal guy, then you meet an eccentric guy and he treats you like shit, you suck, i don’t know how a guy could date you long term and be happy except for the brief moments of sex, you probably just get used for sex and live an otherwise meaningless life.

T: 5/7/2016 3:31:29 PM
Considering I wasn’t online at the time of your messages which is why i didnt respond, just got on today. Wow. Well, you’re my first psycho on here, congratulations. Best of luck to you.

sd16sd1: 5/7/2016 9:08:26 PM lol, i’m definitely normal in all ways, but i have a feeling you will have a lot of problems on here, I see you being another sit on here for years girl.

sd16sd1: 5/8/2016 11:56:12 AM I know I said some mean things, I didn’t mean any of it, I think the world of you, I wish you would give me another chance, I am really a good guy, I just wanted to know that I had all of your attention, I don’t think that is asking a lot, I think you are an amazing girl, if I could choose any woman it would be you, I would love the opportunity to take care of you and support you in all you do.

sd16sd1 5/8/2016 7:45:27 PM fuck it i was right about you , you are a dumb skank

T 5/8/2016 8:06:12 PM Hey Psycho Sam, go back to school and learn about punctuation. After you’re done with that make sure to stop by a Psychiatric institute before you kill your next victim.

sd16sd1 5/8/2016 8:48:14 PM lol, I don’t believe in killing, and my punctuation is fine, punctuation is not a derivative of intelligence, punctuation is a box and people that think in those terms are stuck in it. being you, Einstein the most brilliant mind scientifically in history did not believe in reading, he said it builds a repetitive thought pattern, punctuation is developed from reading too much.

sd16sd1 5/8/2016 8:50:49 PM ya big cold hearted meany

The same day I chat with James in the batman shirt, he is a straight up hottie; too bad he was dull witted. I was having a nice banter with nortonowl but when I told him I couldn’t meet for a drink yet he got weird. I did have the pleasure of bantering with a gentleman who gave me his number then deleted his online account. We’ve been talking since. So far he hasn’t called me an old ass lady or a dumb skank. Progress.

Stay tuned for DAY FOUR!

-xo T.


One thought on “Demon Slayer Seeks Sidekick: Day Three

  1. Love, love, love this!! I only chuckle, ’cause I know!!! For every nice guy you come across, there are about 20 weird-os or psychos filling up your inbox! Use your intuition. And continue to write about it!!! Good stuff!

    Liked by 1 person

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