Hit Replay

When you have $10 until your next paycheck and you spend it on wine and dog food… Priorities.

When you intend to work on your blog this evening but procrastinate by being self-involved and taking the perfect new artistic selfie for said blog… Delusional Dumbass.

Add in the perhaps-orphaned baby bunny that may need someone who has small animal bottle feeding skills… Shiny!

Here is what I know in a not-so-artistic format:

I hear I am pretty in the eyes of my friends and family. Not so much to the man I love.

I’m deemed stand-offish. Cold. Removed.

I am supposed to be doting and loving, snuggly and giving. I am supposed to need money and favors.

I am not to ever forget a gesture I thought of as genuinely sweet. Mere words of thank you and I appreciate you do not encompass the enormity of said gesture. I am to praise he who bestows it upon me with every breath I take.

My touch is equated to that of petting a dog.

Meeting friends and family, hanging out with all of whom he loves does not mean I am part of his world. (Do you hear the Little Mermaid, too??) It is all about me.

I am not to rely on my work ethic or continue with two jobs. I am to accept help. I am to rue help. I am to feel like shit when I do not accept help.

Be grateful for what you have, damn T! You’re so fucking superficial.

Now, excuse me while I snuggle my dogs. And finish this bottle of wine. Tonight I’ll pray my block dissolves completely. I think I recall being able to write more than rants and lists.

I know you feel burdened by what others think and feel. Is your heart true? Are your intentions good?

Indi   -xo 3T


8 thoughts on “Hit Replay

  1. I don’t mean to point out the obvious, but…is there anything this man you love actually likes about you? WTF? I completely understand spending your last $10 on wine.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. When your gas station napkins doubles as toilet paper and you elect to have your gas shut off rather than your electric = priorities!

    I feel ya though. 😉 I would eat glass right now for a glass of wine, by the way. (It’s only day two into my summer semester and I’m ready to put my head in the blender.)

    On an entirely different note, I doubt your guy shares your self-perspectives! You’re gorgeous and I’m sure you don’t pet him like a dog- haa.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ah, yes…I can be a toilet paper bandit. I do try to go back to wherever I lift a roll and purchase something to make up for it when I do have some moolah.
      $3 bottles of wine are the most awesome thing, even if I must scrounge in the detritus on the floor boards of my truck.
      And thank you on behalf of the boy. He says he does not feel the way I say he feels. But I write how I feel. And how I’m made to feel.
      Let’s write feel again.
      You’re a doll for telling me I’m gorgeous.
      I love my fur kids more than most fleshy people. He should find it flattering that I want to even touch him let alone touch him like I do my most faves.
      😉

      Like

  3. I am remiss for having not read more of your material, as I see you are very kind to my site; however, these words so real as they are describe exactly why I do hope you continue to allow yourself to blog – on your own time – when it happens. Your words are real, as is your life … and your selfie, lovely 🙂

    Musings

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.